By special request, I have decided to come back to blogging. I have issues. I know this. I don’t deny it; I readily admit it. I would never say this out loud but I’m insecure about a lot of things especially my thoughts. I didn’t think anyone but my psychologist and occasionally, the authorities, paid attention to my psycho-ramble. I have to admit though I am flattered that two different people asked me about Sweet Girl Sugar. That’s right, I have a fan base of 2 whole people-if one was my mother I think I would have to kill myself…don’t judge me.
Of course, I have plenty to say until the pressure is on and then I get a total block. Its like a strobe light effect going on in my brain-I’m only catching parts of words. I think better without my pants on. I need to wait till I go home so I can take them off. I prefer not to wear pants. After work I run to my car and take my pants off before I drive home. I do a lot with my pants off. I do homework with out my pants. I study without my pants. I even stand in front of the fridge without my pants and eat pickles… sometimes I just sit and do nothing without my pants. Everything that can be done with pants is better without pants.
I have really random thoughts most of the time. I wish I could be more like those analytical thinkers that solve world hunger or invent innovative devices that the world never had before but now can never live without. Instead I think about why there isn’t a time of day that is mandatory nap time or why don’t humans have the ability to camouflage themselves if lizards can. I thought about gluing all the random things I found on the floor that mom told me never to touch but I still did anyway and making a scrapbook. I thought about having sex in a parking lot or on a park bench or on top of a magic carpet. I think it would be really fun, a little dangerous, but quite refreshing! Yes girls think about sex too. I also thought about socks which led me to the internet which led me to porn which brought me right back to sex…
I’m losing my mind. I’m taking all these classes trying to rush this degree but I can’t concentrate on the analysis of healthcare reform in 5 states or the mental processes of a monkey. I’m thinking about National give Jenn Candy Day and why my overweight bald no-teeth-having neighbor insists on coming over wearing nothing but boxers and socks to see if my water pressure is decent. I need a vacation. I need some sort of escape. These pants are too damn CONSTRICTING! Maybe I need a good stiff one-ALL puns intended, and I’ll be able to clear my mind and think about things that are constructive like inventing a cup that keeps the vodka at the right cool temperature without the rocks or how to send a text using voice technology. Things people never had but can never live without. Although now that I think a little further-vodka and voice text don’t necessarily go together like PB&J. I’ll have to think about it a little harder…harder…harder…damn, it always goes right back to sex...I need to get laid
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3 comments:
I have to admit this is a very entertaining blog you have. It's semi-food related, so I don't mind following.....if you had a follow button. I did check out your past food posts and they look great. Seriously though, nice recent post. Like I said, very entertaining.
lol loved it! and you're not the only one that thought about voice text! lol i was totally thinking of that too the other day as i was driving. my only concern was will it know to backspace when i tell it, or will it type out "backspace." lol
-pep
NMOS-I think you can follow me by going to your Dashboard. At the bottom you'll find buttons that say "Add" and "Manage." Click Add. Copy and paste my URL "http://www.sweetgirlsugar.blogspot.com/ when prompted and click "Next." Then you can either follow me as NMOS or anonymously. Thanks for the comments of support! I need all the support I can get...
Pep-It definitley needs more thought. My thought is the slurring. If I slur a word will it type the correct word or the slurred word? The application will definitley need to come with some sort of delay that will hold your drunk text for 24hrs so you don't drunk voice text someone at 4am and regret it..."I want your hot turkey leg..." Not good...
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