Entrepreneur? or just Crazy?

I saw The Godfather Sunday. Wait; maybe I should say I FINALLY saw The Godfather Sunday. I got caught in the marathon which is close to 7hrs for only Godfather 1 and 2. I’ve never seen it before. I’ve seen snippets here and there, but never sat and watched the entire picture. This movie is incredible. I have no words. First of all, any movie with Dinero and Pacino is a must see, but we’re looking at a YOUNG Dinero and Pacino here. They’re easily the two most gorgeous men in the history of cinema. Anyway, by the time young Vito Corleone became head of the family I was thinking about the “American Dream” and craving a piece of the American Pie. But is it just relative? What is the American Dream?

This got me thinking of my own dream, or dreams rather. I have so many from being Diana Ross to a race car driver to a fabulous drag queen. Its seems like for the past decade I've wanted to own my own business. Entrepreneurship-now that’s MY American Dream. Its funny how some things sound like good ideas; they go in one ear, you get excited, and then its right out the other. Or the worst is when you have an idea but don't follow it, then see it on store shelves a year later! I wish I could count the numerous things I've thought about and seen in retail stores EVERYWHERE, especially those things that have become fads-like jeweled flipflops or rose bud hair clips! UGH!

Then there are those things that you just can’t seem to let go of, even when you think you have or you’ve tried, its still in your heart. That bug done bit me again….I know God has put it in my heart and He’s telling me to get with it! I see signs everywhere. You know how that happens? When you think about having a kid for instance, and then all you can see is pregnant women? Or when you have to pee really bad and then all of a sudden you see a dog taking a leak, and an old man watering the grass, and kids jumping in a pool, and someone drives down the street blaring ABBA’s Aquarius in their 1977 yellow Charger…Yeah, well I see those signs everywhere.

It has me all wound up inside. I want it so bad, but then I’m at a loss on where to begin. I’ve been accused of over-thinking, but its part of my processing. Besides, I’m vindicated in one of my favorite quotes “Without leaps of imagination, or dreaming, we lose the excitement of possibilities. Dreaming, after all, is a form of planning.” That’s not mine, that’s Gloria Steinem, but I agree with it. I mean, take my dream last night about zombies. I know now that I won’t let Richard and Pat use my car to get Pat’s twin bed from his house so he can sleep in my living room. I “PLAN” to make his ass sleep on the couch and under the cushions like he did back in the day. Instead of letting Little 3 and Silvio out to eat the zombies, I “PLAN” on keeping them inside the house with us. I also “PLAN” on not playing that stupid zombie video game so late anymore because then I have these dreams which aren’t related to my American Dream.

Anyway, if I haven’t lost you yet and you’re still crazy enough to read my irrational thoughts, there’s a diner somewhere where a piece of that American Pie rests on a pretty white plate beckoning you to take a bite. There’s a dollop of cool whip (emphasis on the H) on top and a shiny clean fork there for the taking. Although I think I’m running low on gas here and there, I “fill ‘er up” and keep on truckin’ because I know I’m so close I can taste it!